Sat night 10 hour ER shift:

8:50 pm: The hospital lobby is nearly empty. If I ignore the strange people in PJ's carrying around sleeping bags, it is not so different from my morning walk. Dark out, bright in, I walk past Starbucks with hope... if only... The first people I see get my best 'good morning' smile. Unfortunately I also verbalize it out loud and immediately feel like a retard.

10 hrs to go...

11 pm: Cute resident, Nice attending... Maybe it won't be a bad night. 40 ppl in ED! Why aren't they at home watching oprah's Oscar special??? We have two 3rd year medical students; they don't talk much and I'm too new to be chatty. Ohhhh... I want to be third years... just for awhile.

3:30 am: A blur of charts, pts, dictations. My throat hurts. Many water bottle refills, many trips to the bathroom. Must talk sparingly now. I get so pale in the middle if the night. All the color just drains out of my cheeks. If not for a little eyeshadow, I would look like death. Checking my email without thinking... old habbit...

3.5 hrs to go

4:21am: time is sllooowwing down. Spend 10 min flushing an eye with saline... just to get out a sweater fuzz. Don't ask me why he couldn't just rub it out... The wife is really cute. I would admire how cute they are together except he smokes. That ruins it all... I can see it now, lung cancer in 10 years. She might even get it first... Second hand smoke... Selfishness, stupidity, *bad word, bad word*

I phone battery halfway down...

6:09 am: awaiting ct results for a poor little lady with sore throat. She cried when I touched her neck. The resident said I could do another admission if I want. Uhmmm... Sure I do. I'm dying to do another admission that's sure to make my shift go over.

I miss my team...

6:31 am: Still waiting for the ct... will not leave on time. That is the problem with this count down, the clock does not have the final say.

I miss my team...

2:00 pm Oscar night: post shower, post nap, post oatmeal... Turned on the TV and there is Keira Knightly in that emerald green gown... ahhh, that's my inspiration gown for the day.