There is a certain sadness in reading old entries. I always try to recall the "past me" and compare it with the present. What changed? What hasn't? I find that my writing was so much more personal back then. I dared to put it out there more, not afraid to be corny. Now, I'm more guarded and aware. Just the other day I peeled off the Hello Kitty band aid because it seems not age-appropriate or work-appropriate or some other kind of inappropriateness (sorry, Maria).

Do you ever wonder how other people see you? I have this secret fear that I am completely off base when it comes to my perception of the persona I present forth every day. Of course I have asked my friends... but their answers are superficial. Maybe they don't want to tell me the truth. Maybe I tune out the truth because I don't want to accept it. Last night my friend said -- you're like a princess. What the ****?! I think he said it without giving it any thought, unaware of the effect it would have on me. I hate it when people do that!

I haven't studied for a test in quite awhile, dating back to Step II in September. That is why this Saturday morning, confronted by the upcoming Neurology exam next Friday, I find myself in an unfamiliar state of mind.

Am I... anxious about procrastinating?

I uploaded onto Facebook all the pictures I have been thinking of uploading, baked some short bread cookies, looked for cake recipes for my friend's birthday next week, dusted my computer keyboard, changed my blog format, updated my blog, re-read old blogs, and almost painted my finger nails...