Quote(s) of the Day

2014.  You have not been so good.  You  know what you have done thus far, and I'm willing to overlook it if you promise to get a grip on it, and lighten up!!  I have always loved looking back through this blog (more like a journal at times) and spot rough patches, but try as I might cannot seem to remember the details of the badness.  I think of it as a symbolic reminder that this too, shall pass (and forgotten).  So without going into any details, suffice to say you have been stingy with luck where luck is needed, reopened some old scars that were just beginning to heal, and even as the long harsh winter is ending, you have made it difficult to see the hope of Spring

Some inspiration from some of my favorite blogs.  LaLaLovely.com.  I want to frame this and hang it in my bathroom.  I feel a tiny light hitting a dark corner of my mind every time I read this quote.  

Lil Blue Boo. You're so right.  Life can be such a B****.  

http://www.lilblueboo.com 

Light note, Heavy note

Let's start on a light note.

I, for one, have always wanted a TV in the bedroom.  This is mostly because I have never had one.  TV was always a guilty pleasure growing up.  I sneak in Oprah after school hours before my parents got home, when I should be doing homework.  In college my roommate had a TV that I was not allowed to turn on, and thus too prideful to watch.  Then when I had my own apartment during residency, paying double for cable was not an option.

Fast forward to my current house, a home of endless comfort and love.  It has a HUGE bedroom complete with a sunroom and eight large winders.  What it really needs is a TV.  I promise to be cognizant of Oprah's wisdom, that the bedroom should be a sanctuary, a peaceful place to begin and end the day.

On a heavier note.

I can't talk about it in concrete words, suffice to say it is a dark shadow in my life.  Friends or Foe, sometimes is a very very thin line.  I am lucky to have people in my life around whom I let my guard down, but it seems I shouldn't.  I am a wiser/stronger person today.  But oh how horrible, and I wouldn't wish upon anyone.  When I have a daughter one day, I will warn her about this.  In the meantime, remember I am strong.

Blueberry Cake Day

I haven't baked something to be proud of in a long time.  There have been many disasters in between.  Many of them involving meringue.  This Blueberry "Plain" Cake is anything but plain (thus why I added the quotation marks).  It should be called Special Blueberry Cake.  Because it is, not only tastes special, but makes the person who bakes it FEEL special.  There is a reason why Dorie Greenspan has such a solid fan following (myself included).  It's because of SIMPLE cakes like these that have an unbelievable depth of flavor.  It brings joy to my day.  Bubbling with blueberries (I used more than 2 cups, and could have used more), this cake was gorgeous before it even came out of the oven.  My house is now filled with caramel sweetness, and my heart is filled again with baking confidence!  On to my next cake!

http://www.culinate.com/books/collections/all_books/Baking/Blueberry-Brown+Sugar+Plain+Cake

I used a 9 inch round pan and baked for 30 min.

Girls weekend

Packing for San Francisco!

Ji and I are visiting my soul sister, the gentle friend that I have known and loved for the past eight years.  I think being an only child enforced the importance of friendships, and never have I gone through a stage in my life without a "best friend" by my side.  Some of them I no longer keep in touch with, but I still think of how they have made growing up better, easier.   Thuy and I have been apart for a little over one year, and often I wish she lived two streets over instead of across the country.  But such is life, and I am grateful for my friend.

It's my birthday...

… I do what I want!

I blurted that out around 9AM and it became the theme of my 32nd birthday.  Steve rolled his eyes and chuckled in disbelief, "it's going to be a long day".  For reasons not completely understood, it was one of my favorite birthdays I can remember.  May have something to do with not working, not studying, not on call, but may also have something to do with the first birthday I spent with my husband (2011 we met shortly after my birthday, 2012 I was on call and we celebrated one day early, 2013 I was working and we went to the melting pot, barely able to stay awake on the drive home).  Also, I loved all my Facebook posts from friends I haven't heard from in so long.

Dinner at the Optimist (http://theoptimistrestaurant.com) was amazing.  It is now my official favorite restaurant in Atlanta, and not only for sentimental reasons.  It is actually bright enough inside to take pictures without flash and STILL be able to see faces.  There is a bustling energy inside, great open space, high industrial ceilings.  The food was not too pretty, not too new, not too heavy, not too boring.

An update on my No Spending January thus far.

Things I passed up on - 

1. Vanessa Bruno silk dress that is DIVINE (in color, cut, fabric, and what I imagine it will look like on me) and 70% off!  This was a hard one to pass, and even made it to my shopping cart at one point.  However the price (still about $500 and the few occasions that I might wear it) made me click delete.  I have a feeling I will be thinking about this one.

2. Those knives, always those knives.

When I was too weak to say no - 

1. Isabel Marant dogtooth print pants.  Don't ask, I'm still not sure about this one.  I am in need to more interesting pants and these I can even wear to work.  Plus they're at a great price.  Plus they can be returned if anything less than perfect.

Did I mention Net-A Porter emailed me an extra 20% off coupon?  I have a feeling if my resolution has any chance of real success, there are websites that must be blocked and emails that must be unsubscribed.  Sigh...

New Years Resolutions

Six days into the new year - 2014 - I'm not doing so well.  Inspired by Hollywood Housewife, No (frivolous/unnecessary/indulgent) Spending January officially busted after 4 days.  Maybe it wasn't such a wise choice to start on a double birthday month - mine and my mother in law.  Still… I'm not deterred.  In fact, I will put both birthday presents under the "must have" bucket and get back on the wagon (this and this).

Some things are black and white.  A new purse? Another pair of shoes? Another coat (not even thinking about it)?  Definitely red zone.  Groceries, light bulbs, gas, definitely green zone.  Here are a few things in the grey zone.  I stare at them in the store, biting my nails, walk away then come back (and if I'm good, walk away again).  It's really quite pathetic.

1. Shun knife.  After my last one broke (lesson learned, no more chopping chicken bones with my favorite knife), I definitely don't want to replace it with anything else.  I'm not in a bind for knifes per say…

2. Decoration/furniture for the house.  Maybe we should have a budget.  This house really is a bottomless pit of spending.  Items we (or just me) are desperately searching for is a desk chair, some paintings for the wall, bedroom set, couch for Steve's man cave, a desk for him, a chair/bench for the downstairs office…  Like I said, bottomless pit (but a lovely one, really).

3. An SUV??????  Where does this fall when we are trying to save money??

On a more positive (and less materialistic) note, things I really wish for in the new year.

1. Health.  It's not a secret we are getting old, and by we, I mean myself and my parents.  The other day Steve and I watched About Time and it has me WEEPING.  I am sentimental to a fault, and this movie touched on a sour sour note.  If you have ever lost someone and wish just for one more minute (hour, day) with them, don't watch this movie in public.  Anyways health is what I wish for for all my loved ones, first and foremost.

2. Gratitude.  If I had more of this, then maybe my resolution to buy less things would be easier to follow.  I need this in bold letters, written everywhere!  I am thankful.

As I am feeling ever so optimistic in the beginning of this new year, it is only fitting to end this post with one of my favorite quotes.

Let us be merry while we may and have joy on our minds, for sorrow can catch us whenever it pleases. 
- Sir Gawin and the Green Knight

Happy Holidays!

Meet our first Christmas tree, a 30 dollar 6 feet tree that, once all set up, is somehow shorter than me.  Steve found it on Black Friday sale at Target.  Although we say (daily) that it will be returned, we still dolled it up with lights, an owl, a red star, and ornaments old and new (mostly new).  The challenge was finding the tree skirt since my husband refuses to pay more for the skirt than the tree…  As always, his perseverance paid off, when he finally came across "santa the tree skirt" at Home Depot.  Super cute!!

I have loved plugging in this tree every morning, especially on rainy and dreary ones like today.  The glow and warmth from a Christmas tree is what people call "holiday magic".  It's why this is the happiest season of the year.  Maybe one day (soon) we will get a bigger tree, but for now, I'm loving it.  

Our house is our home, our happy place. 

2013, year of the honeymoon cruise.

Steve hearts golf

My cuddly owl!

I'm always saving buttermilk recipes.  Inevitably when I buy buttermilk for one recipe, there is half gallon left fermenting in my fridge until past expiration date.  Not until now have I found a recipe that is worth making (after all, it's hard to get inspired to make cornbread or entire apple cake).

Buttermilk braised chicken!!  It's a recipe I will go to whenever there is leftover buttermilk in my fridge.

Now… on to that apple cake.

I am getting attached to my long hair.  It's somewhere between long and super long, and I shy at the thought of cutting it.  I envy pictures of shoulder length bobs, slightly curled, slightly wavy.  The weight of my own hair is nothing short of comforting, if not always bouncy and smooth.  I am attached.

About work.

I am grateful for it.  I count down days until I'm back at it, with mixed feelings of dread and eagerness.  I expect the intensity of both to fade over the years.  Walking into work, there is a pep in my step.  Leaving work, there is (slightly more) pep in my step.  I don't hate it.  I am grateful for it.

On the days I'm not working, I plan meal recipes, catch up on my favorite blogs, look for books to read, and plan vacations.  Oh, and shop.  Working days make the nonworking days more meaningful.  That, I am grateful.

the Hunger Games part II

All is well that ends well, and I'm proud of my husband for sticking to his guns and detoxing for 48 hours.  In the end, he didn't finish two gallons of the horrid lemon water juice.  That may have been the worst part.  We are back to eating three square meals a day, happily together.

Loving the apparatus.  Imagine laying on the floor, staring at these half balloon, half cloud, somewhat whimsical, totally inspiring creations.

the Hunger Games

This has not been a good week (or month, for that matter).  The only redeeming factor is now gone - my happy, cheery, supportive husband, has turned into a grumpy, mopy, irritable impostor.  It all started with an innocent and HEALTHY notion of a juice detox that he read about somewhere and started to talk about over the past few weeks.  I was ALL for it, always nagging him to eat healthier (and lesser?), even picked out the exact dates for him to try.  TODAY and tomorrow!

There may have been a selfish ulterior motive as well.  I envisioned less time worrying about what to cook and eating whatever I want (not exemplary myself in either food selection or portion control) for 48 hours.  In short, a mini-holiday from cooking and feeling guilty about not cooking.

Oh how it backfired on me from hour 0, when S realized that detox means no coffee.  I knew he was in trouble when I took a sip of his diluted, sour, water+lemon juice that made my nose wrinkle.  Really, I expected more from Whole Foods.

We are in too deep now, but I want my husband back.  In conclusion - detox should be done on your own time when it won't have to be witnessed by loved ones.  Because really, hunger is hard to watch.

late night reading

Late night reading - 

"But the thing about life is that you simply cannot settle for melancholy, even when it's true.  You are not a tragedy, you are a personal essay.  You must rise above and you must do it in the last paragraph with basic grammar and easily recognized words."

A Personal Essay by a Personal Essay - Christy Vannoy

August rains in Atlanta remind me of temper tandrums.  Come and gone with no warning, and once gone, not a trace of resentment.  So I headed out today in jeans, boots, and an umbrella when the second I got into my car, the heavy down pour that made me doubt my decision to leave the house at all only seconds before... stopped!  And I spend the afternoon outlet shopping with friends in shorts and flip flops.

12 to 12

I'm working strange hours these days.  12 to 12.  More like 12 to 10 since I always slip out early (I let others slip out early too when they are on 12 to 12, for working till midnight is truly depressing).  I have gotten used to waking up at 10AM and having time to straighten my hair before I go to work, looking more put together.  It also means more quality time with my husband since he works from home on some days.  I get to wake up to him fully caffeinated, and drink the rest of his coffee.

I like to refer to S as husband instead of hubby because I have waited so long to call someone my husband; every syllable counts.

My husband went to Destin with his family today, and left me behind.  I came home to an empty apartment at 10 pm, and all of a sudden can't remember what's so great about solitude, silence, and personal space.  I miss my husband terribly.

I saw (not one but) two lightning bugs on my way home tonight.  It feels like instant good luck.  The first one flickered in front of me so fast by the time I realized what it was, it was gone.  Made me smile anyway.  It was dark, dingy and wet, did not seem the place for something so magical as a lightning bug. :)

cheese buns

http://deeperstory.com/the-day-i-ate-6-cheese-buns/

I love this story.  The courage it must take to tell something so dark, hidden and personal in its complete detail, with complete honesty.  It stirs up memories not so distant, and makes me wonder if I'm still the same girl who was addicted to cream cheese and couldn't stop eating it by the spoonful.

Loving this red dress.  It is my "cheese bun".

Life is not poetic these days.  It's very gritty, full of grown up issues.  S softens this reality, filling each day with laughter, silliness and his kind, goofy smile.  Will marriage always be so good?  I often wonder.  After three years together and almost one year of marriage, S officially moved in with me.  The combining of things and having two of everything.  He will officially try and sell his condo.  This is because we have (almost) officially bought a house!  I'm officially excited + overwhelmed, S is officially stressed + overwhelmed.  I'm more vocal about it.  He is the strong and silent type.

hectic times

A LOT of things are going on right now.  2013 has been HECTIC!  I'm all nerves 55% of the time (not more only because I sleep a lot).

Quote of the day - All men are high maintenance, even the low maintenance ones.

Other things are happening as well...

Such as house hunting.  Who would have guessed that my husband and I would be stumbling over ourselves (and other people) trying to find a house in Milton, Georgia, aka horse country.

Such as September honeymoon to Barcelona and then cruise around South of France and Italy.  No exclamation mark because I haven't started to plan yet.  Will contain my excitement even if by punctuation only.

Such as my first Miu Miu!

Such as being young and in love!  I try not to take my husband for granted, the best part of my everyday.

the ring

Today Steve and I bought a sapphire ring for my mom for Mother's Day.  I had intended this same style with a ruby inside, but only the sapphire was available in this setting.  I just love the almond shaped cluster of small but distinct diamonds.  Here is to hoping mom likes it!

In other news -
Today we found a normal looking cafe in a non-sketchy part of town with NO wireless internet!  When they told Steve there was no internet available, he asked - what happened to it?

Also.  Tomorrow we are going house hunting with a realtor.   I'm going through all the right motions (even got prequalification done), but the concept of buying a house is still very surreal.  Whenever Steve asks me - what are we going to do with such a big house, I'm speechless.  What ARE we going to do with the extra four bedrooms and three bathrooms and that unfinished basement??

Lastly.  Honeymoon destination may be changed from Paris to Barcelona.  If so, I want to stay here!

Sunday again.  Next week is a normal Monday through Friday working week.  Fingers crossed.

One day into summer weather, and I'm over it already.  This warm, tepid, tiresome day, and my perpetual indecisiveness over which temperature to set the AC.  Tomorrow baby natalie is coming to visit me with her mom, can't wait!  I'm craving some girl time.  Last weekend of Dallas wedding and mini-reunion just left me wanting more.  Marriage is good, marriage is wonderful, but nothing replaces my girlfriends.

My Berlin Kitchen, finished in three days.  Is it strange that I can drawl so many parallels between her life and mine?  Even her blog The Wednesday Chef I can't enough of, reading some old posts from years ago way past my bedtime last night.  Surprisingly, to myself most of all, I'm not all that into food blogs.  They leave me feeling a bit on the jealousy side, with all those lustrous photos of food and throngs of devout followers.  But this one I feel a personal connection to, her words and style of writing really resonate with me.  Why do I see so many similarities between our experiences?  An Italian-Berliner who lived decades in the US and then finds her soul (and soulmate) in Berlin, and me a Chinese-American who finds herself now with more Vietnamese relatives than both Chinese and American combined.  I suppose that's the common human experience, the craving for roots and traditions and (what else) love.  Capital L.

Things I love April 2013

1. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo trilogy, the second and third books are so much better than the first.  Don't believe those who say the books have no closure, I know all about closures and the trilogy did well.  It is sad of course that the writer passed away.  One can only imagine how fast I would have downloaded and read the rest of the books if they were available.

On to The Berlin Kitchen per recommendation by Linda Lee.

2. My new slow cooker and the chicken soup that it churns out after 10 hours.  It was worth getting the slow cooker for that recipe alone!  It brings back memories of my first few weeks in the US, jet lag, and how it was the only thing that tasted good.

3. Can't wait to use the red spinner courtesy of my husband.

4.

My ao dai and everything about 3/2/2013.  

5.

This sweater is so soft and makes me infinitely happy.

6. 

So cute.

7.  Drinking coffee at 2pm.